I wonder if there has ever been a Christian who at some point, at least in a private moment, did not wonder about the efficacy of prayer and, specifically, why some prayers seem unanswered. Does God hear us? What about his promises to respond and give us what we ask?
Paul Tautges, our Review Editor for Counseling here at Books At a Glance, provides some brief answers for us in his Brass Heavens: Reasons for Unanswered Prayer, and today he talks to us about this common puzzle.
Books At a Glance (Fred Zaspel):
Perhaps it would be best to begin with a broad reminder of the privilege of prayer that every Christian enjoys – the ground and reasons for prayer and God’s attending promises. Could you sketch that out for us?
Tautges:
Indeed, prayer is a great privilege for every believer in Christ. In Christ, we have been reconciled to our heavenly Father who loves us more than we know. His covenant keeping love and tender attention to our cares result in the Father turning His ear toward us when we pray. The ground for prayer is found in the sin-atoning work of Jesus on our behalf. In Christ, we have a faithful High Priest who continually intercedes for us, standing between us and the Father. Because His work has already been accepted by the Father (proved by the resurrection), we are accepted in Him. This Father-child relationship with God is nurtured and strengthened through prayer, training us to remain in full dependence upon Him and His all-sufficient grace. God delights in the child-like faith that prayer embodies.
Zaspel:
Most of us can understand rather easily that “God knows best” and that he answers our prayers accordingly. But how do we reconcile that with the (at least seemingly) broad promises given to us, that God will give what we ask? Is our reading of those promises perhaps skewed in some way?
Tautges:
Yes, without knowing it, our inborn self-focus often skews singular promises, usually by interpreting them in a manner that disconnects them from the whole counsel of God in Scripture. This often results in our seeing only what we can “get out” of prayer. God’s larger purpose for us is to display the glory of His grace for all eternity. When we understand this then we may more readily accept that God has a good and holy purpose for the periods of silence, times when prayer seems to continue to go unanswered. He wants to test our faith that we might see for ourselves just how weak and dependent we are on Him for all good things. His goal is nothing less than to heighten our spiritual sensitivities in order to draw us into more intimate fellowship and faithful obedience with Him. Prayer goes unanswered because God knows our needs far better than we understand our desires. At the same time; however, we do serve a God who delights in His children and joyfully listens intently to our cries for help.
Zaspel:
Okay, could you sketch out for us, in just broad categories, some reasons – pertaining to us and/or God – why God may not answer our prayers?
Tautges:
In relation to us, the reasons for unanswered prayer are connected to sinful attitudes and actions. For example, one specific reason for unanswered prayer is our pet sins; that is, the care we sometimes take to feed forms of rebellion that remain in our hearts. Another specific reason is the neglected duty of doing everything in our power to resolve our conflicts with others. If we are unwilling to do as God’s Word commands then He will close His ears. Also, the attitudes of our heart are more important to God than we realize. Religious sins like pride and self-exaltation, a husband’s lack of honor toward his wife, and a stubborn heart also hinder our prayers. Lastly, there is a reason for unanswered prayer that is more related to God than to us in the sense that there does not seem to be a particular cause related to our heart or habits of life. I am referring to God’s testing of our faith. By delaying His answers, God tests our faith as we wait, cultivating trust that would never be developed if we always received answers immediately.
Zaspel:
Explain for us how or why our sins and failures of responsibility would render our prayer ineffective. Given the ground of prayer that we have already discussed, why should sins matter?
Tautges:
The answer to this question is found in the Father’s chastening love for His children. What I mean is that we must never forget that Jesus has fully taken the punishment of our sins away and presently serves as our High Priest. Therefore, when God does not answer our prayer it is not because He is making us pay for our sins; Christ already took care of that fully. Our position before God does not change when we sin. However, the Father’s sanctifying love for us sometimes results in His use of delayed answers to prayer to further the work of conforming us to the image of Christ. I say this because it is in the context of God’s chastening love that we must think about the specific reasons that He may not be answering. This particular aspect of God’s love is so important that I spend an entire chapter on it before narrowing the focus on specific reasons. Our sins matter because God is holy and has called us to reflect that same holiness. Unanswered prayer is one means by which God gets our attention, leads us to repentance, and moves us closer and closer to modeling the holiness of Christ.
Zaspel:
This is often a real puzzle for people. Of course we have sinned today. And we all have “pet” sins – sins that recur all too often. How, then, can we ever expect God to hear us? And how do we answer this question without undoing your previous answer?
Tautges:
I know I’ve said this already, but it cannot be overstated. We can only ever expect God to answer our prayers because we come to Him in Jesus’ name, that is, through the perfect work of our Savior. If we are trusting in Jesus Christ as our sin-bearer then God has dealt rightly with our sins. Therefore we can be assured that we are in right standing with him. Returning to this gospel truth brings to our minds the assurance that only God’s Word provides: “And this is the testimony, that God gave us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life. And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him” (1 John 5:11-15). This promise should not only compel us never to give up on prayer, but also deal readily with our sins so that God’s restorative discipline—for our own good and His glory—is not longer or more difficult than it needs to be.
Zaspel:
More positively, how might unanswered prayer be simply a tool by which God cultivates in us a deeper practical godliness?
Tautges:
As God performs his sanctifying work in us—conforming us to the image of his Son, “the founder and perfecter of our faith” (Hebrews 12:2)—there will be times when answers to prayer seem out of all possible reach. When we try to discern the cause for this, we may find that self-examination doesn’t help. Maybe we have been diligent in trying to kick our pet sins out of the house, we’re unaware of any ongoing conflicts or offenses with other believers, and we’ve been fighting diligently against self-righteousness and an independent spirit. Nevertheless, it seems that God has closed his ears to our cries. It is at times like this that we need to remember the purpose of prayer, which is to train us to be dependent upon God. When God delays His answers, while at the same time the Spirit bears witness with our spirit that the answers we long for are honorable, then our faith is refined as gold and the perseverance of our faith results in God being glorified in our growth toward spiritual maturity.
Books At a Glance:
How should all this shape our attitude in praying? Some advise us to pray expectantly. Others emphasize that we should pray submissively. How do we balance this out? What should be our attitude when we pray? Can we pray with confidence?
Tautges:
Surely, God wants us to pray all of the above. Of course, the underlying attitude in prayer should always be one of humble, submissive faith. However, this does not negate our praying in a spirit of bold expectation for God to answer and, sometimes, to answer us quickly. We balance this out and pray in confidence by remembering that the ground for prayer is never found in ourselves. As long as we remember that it is in Christ—and in Christ alone—that we are accepted by God then having such an able High Priest compels us to pray with confidence.
